Geri Ilagan went through a bad marriage and suffered from depression. Read on to learn how one coaching session transformed her from a struggling mom to a hustling mom.

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I used to believe that I needed to be liked by everybody, otherwise I would end up alone. I also believed that as long as I am not alone, I would be okay. These beliefs always spurred me to be liked and accepted. However, a bad marriage lowered my self-esteem. I felt I did not deserve to be loved. Instead, I thought I deserved not to be treated right. I felt that I wasn’t good enough for anyone despite my best efforts.

Life back then was definitely hard. I was the only one who was working in my family, and it was exhausting to work and take care of your children at the same time. I had been working for ten years in the corporate world then, and the constant business travel, little sleep, and stress took its toll on me. I became depressed. I felt hopeless. Sometimes, the only thing that seemed to make any sense was the thought of ending it all. In my mind, perhaps my children would have a better life without me.

Finding Hope In The Darkest Of Times

The straw that broke the camel’s back came in 2012 when I lost my son. I tried jumping out the second-floor window of my home after cutting my wrists. I lost the last strand of sanity in me. I let depression swallow me. But God was good because He never left my side. He gave me hope, and an opportunity to start over, by giving me my fourth child.

I took that as a sign that God believed me to be a capable mother. Right then and there I decided I would be stronger for my children, that I would do everything for them. Life was still hard but it was getting better, even though by then the decade I spent working in the corporate world was still exhausting. So, I decided to make a career change and work from home. I was excited about the endless opportunities for me to earn more and be able to be with my children at the same time.

Working from home was fun at first, but as opportunities for more jobs poured in the less time I had for my children. I worked most of the time. If I wasn’t working, I was either doing laundry, cooking, cleaning the house, or sleeping. No fun time with my kids. And then, I got sick. I wasn’t able to work for almost a month. During this period, I had enough time to notice the changes in my children. They became distant from each other. They would fight over little things. They became impatient.

I realized that my children had been missing their mother. They felt neglected because I was so busy with work. I wanted to give them the best but instead, I have deprived them of what they really needed—to spend time with them. I was then faced with another struggle: how do I make sure that I earn money for my family, yet still find time to be with them? Again, I felt that I wasn’t good enough; that I will never be good enough to succeed. That opportunities only come to great people and I am not one of them.

A Second Epiphany

Then, a single Flow + Hustle Mastermind live session by Antonette Nicholas changed my life. I met my coach Antonette in one of her live sessions. She discussed clarity, loving yourself, and being able to find your premium clients. It sounded so appealing to me.

As I completed her masterclass, I began to recognize my potential but still afraid of coming out of my comfort zone. I also realized that I’ve always wanted to be a coach. I would always picture myself guiding people and giving them tips and best practices. But like a child, I used to think that was just a pipe dream.

One day, I found myself in a situation where I needed to raise a certain amount of money. The only solution I have was to pawn my laptop but Antonette gave me a better solution. She told me to offer an online class in exchange for cash. I thought it will not work but I had to give it a try.

I went ahead and posted it. I was so nervous that I was shaking. I was so afraid of being humiliated. I even clicked on the post with my eyes closed. Deep inside, I felt like I have jumped off the cliff. It was one of the greatest risks I ever took in my life. What if nobody signed up for my class? After a few hours, messages came pouring in. People were inquiring about the class and they were interested in signing up.

Still, believing in myself was not that easy. I thought I just got lucky. But in my class, I was surprised to hear from my students that they were learning from me. It was the most amazing feeling. It was better than getting promoted. I loved the feeling of being appreciated. I created a page and conducted live sessions that discussed my knowledge and experience. It felt good to know that you can help other people. I began to feel good about myself. I never regretted that day when I took a leap of faith.

My life changed for the better. Now, I believe that I can fulfill my dreams. My dreams now are not just ideas but goals. The dark days of my life have passed, and I am completing the plans I have for my life and for my children.

I am now happy with what I do. I am supporting and providing coaching to parents, mostly mothers like me who would like to earn for their children and still have time for them. I am helping mothers realize that they do not need to struggle just to be able to be a provider and a mother at the same time. I want them to experience the transformation I had, from a struggling mom to a hustling mom.

 

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