Positivity psychologists define gratitude as a deeper appreciation, and consider it to be an extremely important positive emotion.

Here Are Twenty Reasons Gratitude Is Essential For A Happy, Healthy, And Fulfilling Life:

1. Gratitude shares the same etymology as the word ‘grace’ – the Latin gratus.
2. Friedrich Nietzsche said that ‘the essence of all beautiful art, all great art, is gratitude.’

3. In his book Attitudes Of Gratitude¹, J. Ryan writes that gratitude is a stance that we choose to take through the good times and bad.
4. Leading scientific expert on gratitude, Robert A. Emmons² , says that gratitude is ‘an affirmation of goodness’ and allows us to ‘recognise that the sources of this goodness are outside of ourselves’ and ‘we acknowledge that other people – or even higher powers, if you’re of a spiritual mindset – gave us many gifts, big and small, to help us achieve goodness in our lives.’
5. Emmons confirms through his research that gratitude improves depression. It creates neurochemical changes and affects the reward and emotional centres in the brain in the same way antidepressants do.
6. Emmons, along with other researchers, agrees that because gratitude requires us to see how other people support us, makes it a ‘relationship-strengthening emotion.’
7. Sociologist Georg Simmel³ says that gratitude is ‘the moral memory of mankind’ because it encourages us to pay it forward.
8. Gratitude improves our social capital – increasing trust, likeability, and enjoyment of social interactions. A 2014 study published in Emotion showed that thanking someone you have just met increases their desire to continue a relationship with you.
9. Gratitude increases pro-social behaviour. A 2012 study by the University of Kentucky found that those who showed higher levels of gratitude had less of a desire to seek revenge and displayed sensitivity and empathy even after they were given less kind and negative feedback.
10. Cultural anthropologist Angeles Arrien⁴ said that gratitude is ‘one of the great arms of love.’
11. Author of bestseller The How Of Happiness: A Scientific Approach To Getting The Life You Want and Professor of Psychology Sonia Lyubomirsky⁵ says that practising gratitude creates a positive mindset, and increases happiness, optimism, and vitality.
12. The research of Shelly Gable⁶, a professor of psychology, shows links between gratitude, cholesterol, blood pressure, and biomarkers. She says that this is because ‘having healthy social ties is good for your physical health, whereas loneliness and feeling disconnected … is linked to illness and mortality.’
13. A study published in Gratitude: Effect On Perspectives And Blood Pressure Of Inner-City African-American Hypertensive Patients showed that patients with hypertension who were asked to count their blessings experienced significant decreases in systolic blood pressure.
14. A 2012 study published on Personality and Individual Differences found that gratitude makes you more likely to exercise and experience better health with fewer aches and pains.
15. According to a 2011 study published in Applied Psychology: Health and Well-Being, writing in a gratitude journal for 15 minutes at night helps you sleep better and for longer.
16. Gratitude journals⁷ create feelings of gratitude which in turn produce positive feedback loops. Writing in a gratitude journal for five minutes daily improves your well-being by 10% after six months, which is the same as if you were to double your income.
17. In a 2014 study published in Journal of Applied Sport Psychology, gratitude was found to increase the self-esteem of athletes which was a major consideration in performance.
18. Gratitude helps in the recovery of those who have experienced trauma. In a 2006 study published in Behavior Research and Therapy, war veterans who exhibited higher levels of gratitude experienced lower rates of Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder.
19. Gratitude increases resilience. In a 2003 study published in the Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, gratitude had a major impact on resilience after the September 11 attacks.
20. Brother David Steindl-Rast⁸, a Benedictine monk, says that ‘gratefulness is the inner gesture of giving meaning to our life by receiving life as a gift.’

You can choose not to complain about what is not working and what you do not have. Instead choose to focus on what is working and the many gifts and blessings you enjoy each and every day that you are alive.

Anyone can express and feel gratitude, it is just a matter of making a decision to do so. Just stop for a few moments and think about what you have in your life – there is sure to be plenty.

I thank you for taking the time to read this post.

Work With Michelle

Contact me for a coaching consultation to speak more about how coaching can support you to achieve clarity, purpose and alignment with your goals in life.

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This is what happens when you meditate: Your mind is totally calm, your body at ease. You feel peaceful, calm, and focused. Your face is the epitome of serenity, free of stressful thoughts and worry. You become more resilient, gaining wisdom and perspective on life’s ups and downs.

Just kidding.

This is what most people think will happen when they meditate. What actually happens more often when you first meditate is that you feel uncomfortable.

Your mind jumps from thought to thought – wondering what you are going to have for lunch or dinner, if you are breathing right, and why you signed up for this class – because you are so darn bored.

If you are sitting on the floor cross-legged in a traditional meditation posture, one or both of your legs will cramp up and your back will start to ache. It might feel interminably long until the bell signalling the end of the meditation goes off and you may decide that running is your meditation because you are really more of an active person.

You may wonder why meditation makes you feel so uncomfortable if it is supposed to be so beneficial. What you may not know is that meditation does not cause you to be uncomfortable; rather, it makes you aware of how uncomfortable and uneasy you are- beneath the surface.

What do you do when you get overwhelmed, uncomfortable, or bored? You go on Facebook, look at your phone, watch movies, or play computer games for hours on end. You have been conditioned in this day and age of social media and instant gratification to avoid discomfort by either entertaining or distracting yourself.

This does not make your discomfort go away; it simply distracts from or suppresses it temporarily. Sometimes this works and you are able to let go of your tension, but more commonly this is a temporary solution and leads to discomfort building up over time into chronic stress and tension.

Meditation brings patience and tolerance by teaching you to accept the state of your mind-body in each moment, just as it is. By learning to tolerate discomfort, you are eventually able to go beyond it into a mature realm of stillness and self-acceptance – where you will find peace of mind, relaxation, and perspective. Here lies the magic.

Beyond your discomfort is an inner witness. It observes your life with neutrality and objectivity. Once you become aware of it, you learn to detach, and stop identifying with the thoughts, emotions, and feelings that cause you to feel stress. A pause develops between the events in your life and your reaction or response, offering you the opportunity to choose your responses with more restraint.

The inner witness is always with you, conscious, alive, and aware. It holds the potential of a life experience rich with creative, cognitive, and sensory possibilities. It is much wider and wiser than your personality and ego-mind. It holds the answers to all the questions you have, if you can stay still long enough to allow them to uncover and trust what you are shown, if you can surrender your resistance to being uncomfortable or bored.

Meditation helps you to contact your inner witness, and know the truth of your innate wisdom and calm.

But you are the one who has to take those first steps and be willing to sit with your discomfort – to go beyond your mind, thoughts, emotions, and sensations.

You have to commit to the process of learning, and be consistent with your practice.

You have to decide that becoming aware is your priority – or rather, knowing your awareness.

You do not have to do it alone. You can join a class with a teacher that will help support you in going beyond your discomfort and resistance.

You have to make the choice to take that first step though.

It is your choice and always has been.

Contact me for a coaching consultation to speak more about how coaching can support you to achieve clarity, purpose and alignment with your goals in life.

_{Edited by Michelle Sarthou
Image credit: Shutterstock}

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“I don’t know what the hell is going on, and that’s ok.”

That is the mantra that New York Time’s bestselling author and life coach Martha Beck says you should say to yourself when you are going through the first stage of a period of transition or change, and your life feels full of uncertainty. She likens change to the process of a caterpillar becoming a butterfly.

In the first stage, Martha says, you are dissolving, like a caterpillar in a cocoon. If you try to cut a caterpillar out of its cocoon at the stage where it is dissolving, you will kill it. It will not have the opportunity to form into its full potential: a butterfly.

During the initial stage of the change process, you will not feel like you have any volition. You will feel like the process is happening to you – and in fact, all you need to do is to allow it to happen. Easier said than done. In many cases, you will need enormous amounts of faith and trust.

This is especially true when your change process is one that came about as a result of a shock, like when you were fired from your job unexpectedly.  Change can also be initiated when you make a personal decision to leave a relationship, or move abroad to find work.

Times of change, however, are opportunities for growth. They show that you have completed all you need to  learn in your life thus far, and are ready to learn more and become more. When you are feeling the most challenged by change, you are actually growing the most.

“What the caterpillar perceives is the end, to the butterfly is just the beginning.” ~Anonymous

What you need to do during times of change is to allow life and the beginnings of change to happen to and through you. To trust that you cannot lose who you truly are, and all that falls away is merely illusion – old habits and ways of living that no longer suit you.

No matter how many times I go through this first stage of change and transition, it still takes me by surprise, and it takes me a while to realize that what I need to do is allow for the change. I have to keep reminding myself that change is a healthy sign of  life that is conscious and evolving.

My mind and ego want things to be known, to stay the same. I find myself desperately trying to hold on to old routines and ways of thinking, instead of allowing my change process to unfold in an organic way, as all life does, in its natural state.

Eventually though, I learnt that by making a choice to let go, and allow for change to take its own form, and getting out of my own way, change happens more smoothly.

I also learnt to ask for help and then be fiercely honest about how I felt, which was at times out of control, hopeless, confused, or uncertain in the midst of change.

You may also want to ask for help through your own change processes.

This help can come from those who have walked through similar change processes and come through to the other side, those that can give you hope and a map to follow, though you will likely find your own routes on this map.

Life is full of change and uncertainty, and we can never predict exactly what is going to happen to us in our lives. It is beyond our ability to plan and control. This is the beauty of it too, that there is a force that is greater than us and that is in charge, because there will most likely be many times in your life when you do not know what the hell is going on and it doesn’t feel ok.

What you need to do is get comfortable with being uncomfortable. Not many people are comfortable with being uncomfortable, which is why many resist change and stay in the same ruts, unhappy relationships, and stagnant life situations for years.

If you can also learn to ask for help when it becomes unbearable, people that have walked through the death valleys of their own doubts and struggles with change, and continue to allow for growth in their lives, will be able to help you. These people will show you the maps of change and help you find your own route through. Allow them to help you.

I know that the wisdom of Martha Beck and my other mentors and guides have helped and continue to help me, when I was able to ask and then trust their helping hands and words of advice.

Are you struggling with change at this moment?

Who can you ask for help with finding your route through your period of change?

—

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In Part 1, we learned that persistance is the key to achieving our big dreams. Read on to discover that, sometimes, there may be a good reason why things don’t work out the way we had intended. 

When I was 22, I was offered the opportunity to audition at three dance schools for their degree programmes in Dance. The auditions were a disaster, and I didn’t get into any of them.

At the time I was really disappointed, but I can see now that what I thought I wanted was not what would have made me happy. Because I didn’t get into dance school, I went to live with two yogis for a year and learnt about the philosophy of yoga and other esoteric teachings. I had the opportunity to practice daily morning meditation, which has now become the mainstay of my spiritual life. This also heralded the start of my discovery of my calling and path as a healer and coach. I thought that I wanted to be a dancer, but it wasn’t what I really truly wanted, as it turned out.

What You Think You Want Is Not Always What You Truly Deeply Want

While living with the yogis, I also read philosophy and self-help books voraciously and came across the work of New York Times’ bestselling author and columnist for O, the Oprah Magazine, Martha Beck. USA Today and Psychology Today have referred to her as “the best-known life coach in America”. In her book Finding Your North Star, Martha Beck says that in order to find out what you truly deeply want, you have to have WIGs – not the kind you put on your head, but the kind that come from your heart – Wildly Improbable Goals.

Martha Beck says that if you think about what you love to do and then the greatest expression of that, you can come up with meaningful goals for your life. For example, if you love to sing, your WIG could be to win Singapore Idol.

Figuring out what you truly want is tricky business. It involves digging deep and being honest about what you yearn for. Martha Beck also says that yearning for something, a relationship or fulfilling career, is a guarantee that we are going to get it. And that we should see all yearning as a promise of what is to come.

You will find out what you truly deeply want in the quiet, still moments of your life. It will not come from your mind or ego; it will come from your heart. When you create meaningful goals, from your heart, you will find that you will be motivated to work toward them and things are more likely to work out.

When I wrote down my WIGs, a decade ago – and it works best when you have a few written down at a time – one of them was to meet a well-known spiritual author. Another was to attend a shamanic workshop this same author had recommended, in Brazil. At the time, this author had stopped teaching, and even when he was teaching, his workshops were priced at thousands of dollars, which I couldn’t afford. The shamanic workshop also cost several thousand dollars, and this was not including the return air fare to Brazil from Singapore. But I thought that maybe in 10 years I might save enough to go to one workshop. I didn’t think it was likely I would meet the author though, since he had said he was not running workshops again. But I wrote these WIGs down anyway, because these were things that I truly deeply wanted.

Less than two years after I wrote down my WIGs, I was on a plane headed to South America for the very first time, about to start what turned out to be one of the most transcendental weeks of my life. I finally got to meet the spiritual author I so yearned to meet, and learned an enormous amount from him. This week was undoubtedly a major turning point in my life. I travelled back to South America two months later, and over the following five years, attended another 13 workshops. Most of them were paid for by the organizers, who eventually hired me as staff.

Over the course of my travels to South America and in the last few years, I gained the confidence to start my own business. Where I had held mainly entry-level jobs previously, I became and still am today, eleven years later, my own boss, learning about running my own business while I do what I love to do and get to share my journey with others on a day-to-day basis. That was another of my WIGs – to be self-employed. In 2011 and 2014, I was certified by Martha Beck as a life and master coach respectively. Things started to work out as I figured out what I truly deeply want. What I truly deeply wanted, what I yearned for, I discovered by looking into my heart.

Your Heart Will Tell You What You Truly Deeply Want

It nudges you in subtle ways and whispers from within you in quiet moments.It will never lead you in the direction of conflict and pain. Conflict and pain come about when how you are living your life goes against what you truly deeply want. Then you may experience difficulties or your life may even fall apart, because that is your unconscious way of dismantling the dysfunction and giving you the chance to start again and do things differently, in line with what you truly deeply want.

During periods where things feel like they are falling apart, you have to allow them to break down and fail: to end. Your ego probably won’t like it, because of the uncertain and undefinable nature of such times, but it’s a necessary part of things coming back together again – like how the leaves on trees must fall off and decompose into the ground in order to become the earth that nourishes the roots of the trees, new leaves and flowers that bud and blossom.

What helped me on my journey of working things out in my life was to aim for goals that had meaning for me and let go of what wasn’t working, in order to make room for what could work. This served me each and every time, and continues to do so. When things don’t work out in your life, it’s sometimes because what you thought you wanted was not what you truly deeply madly wanted.

Contact me for a coaching consultation to speak more about how coaching can support you to achieve clarity, purpose and alignment with your goals in life.

_{This post was first published on Visionary Passages blog and has been reposted on Executive Lifestyle with the permission of the author
Edited by Nedda Chaplin
Image credit: Shutterstock}

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‘Michelle leads a very harmonized approach to meditation and reflection, which is both powerful and inspirational.’ – Germaine Chia, Private Banking Product Manager

This is a non-denominational and non-religious meditation gathering for those who would like to learn and practice basic meditation technique in a group setting. No previous meditation experience is needed; beginners and experienced meditators are welcome. There is basic instruction and guidance during each session.

Regular meditation improves your quality of life. It has been shown to increase IQ; lessen depression; lower blood pressure; help with managing anxiety, addictions and compulsive behaviour; reduce chronic pain, PTSD, insomnia and other symptoms of stress.

Within just eight weeks of meditation, cognitive function improves, your sense of empathy for others increases, your fear centre and mind calm down. In just four sessions of meditation, physical pain has been known to decrease.

‘We don’t sit in meditation to become good meditators; we sit in meditation so that we’ll become more awake in our lives’ – Pema Chodren

‘Meditation takes you beyond the mind’s noisy chatter into the pure awareness that is the source of all your happiness, inspiration and love’ – Deepak Chopra

‘You should sit in meditation for 20 minutes a day, unless you’re too busy, then you should sit for an hour’ – Old Zen saying

Event Details

Drop-in class rate: $25
4-class meditation pass: $80 (valid for one month)
10-class meditation pass: $150 (valid for three months)

(Note: The meditation pass is also valid for Meditation for Modern Minds on Wednesdays at 7pm and Thursdays at 12pm.)

Schedule: Saturdays 9 to 10am
Location: Yoga in Common, 10 Petain Road Singapore 208089

To register please go to Yoga in Common.

Meditation For Modern Minds

‘I enjoyed your class very much. You are wonderful, always loving, thoughtful and willing to share your knowledge with others. This makes you a truly good teacher. From my heart, thank you.’ –  Sudepha, yoga teacher

This is a meditation class for anyone who wants to learn the essential elements of mindfulness and basic meditation techniques. You will learn tools and techniques to take into your day-to-day life that help with managing on-going stress through improved focus, self-awareness and self-mastery.

Besides the tools and techniques of meditation, participants will learn about blocks to mindfulness and how to overcome them so they can sustain a calm and clear mental state. Specific relaxation and stress release exercises will be taught along with solutions and strategies for managing stress and tension.

‘Mindfulness practice means that we commit fully in each moment to be present, inviting ourselves to interface with this moment in full awareness, with the intention to embody as best we can an orientation of calmness, mindfulness, and equanimity right here and right now’ – Jon Kabat-Zinn

‘Mindfulness helps us get better at seeing the difference between what’s happening and the stories we tell ourselves about what’s happening: stories that get in the way of direct experience. Often such stories treat a fleeting state of mind as if it were our entire and permanent self’ – Sharon Salzberg

‘In mindfulness, one is not only restful and happy but alert and awake. Meditation is not evasion; it is a serene encounter with reality’ – Thich Nhat Hanh

Event Details

Drop-in class rate: $25
4-class meditation pass: $80 (valid for one month)
10-class meditation pass: $150 (valid for three months)
(Note: The meditation pass is also valid for Introduction To Meditation on Saturdays at 9am.)
Schedule: Wednesdays 7-8pm and Thursdays 12-1pm
Location: Yoga in Common, 10 Petain Road Singapore 208089

To register please go to Yoga in Common.

Vipassana Meditation Practice

This event is only open to those who are already practitioners of Vipassana Meditation.

Participants are advised to arrive 15 minutes before the start of the event in order to be ready to start on time and practice individually in noble silence for one hour. Do be on time; for purposes of safety and privacy, the main door may be locked once we begin.

Event Details

This event will be run entirely by donation.
Suggested amount: $10-15.
Schedule: Fridays 5-6pm
Location: Yoga in Common, 10 Petain Road Singapore 208089

**Please note that there will be no instruction for this event.

To register please go to Yoga in Common.

Time, energy and attention goes into the preparation of classes each week, therefore, we appreciate that you honour this by advising us of your attendance in advance.

As space is limited, we appreciate it if you only respond once your attendance is confirmed and that you amend your RSVP if your status changes.

Plan to arrive on time or early, so as not to disrupt the session once it has begun. If you are late you are still welcome to join us, but we ask that you be as quiet as possible so as to be mindful of the group already in meditation.

Contact me for a coaching consultation to speak more about how coaching can support you to achieve clarity, purpose and alignment with your goals in life.

_{Edited by Nedda Chaplin
Image credit:Group practicing yoga from Shutterstock
Reference:
http://www.visionarypassages.com/introduction-to-meditation/
http://www.visionarypassages.com/meditation-for-modern-minds/
http://www.visionarypassages.com/vipassana-meditation-practice/}

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Why didn’t you write that best-selling book you know is in you and tell your story? Why didn’t your dream to be an entrepreneur and set up that social enterprise come true? Maybe you didn’t persist.

If you feel overwhelmed by the duties and obligations of daily life, lost or unsure if you have what it takes to pursue your own big dreams of making a meaningful contribution to this world, don’t lose hope. Instead, persist.

If you keep going, in the certainty that eventually you will reach your big dream, you are sure to wear down the resistance of life. What eventually comes to pass may not take the same form as you think it should, but you can never fail if you are determined and willing to put the work in to achieve your big dream.

Oprah Winfrey says, “What I know for sure is this: The big secret in life is that there is no big secret. Whatever your goal, you can get there — as long as you’re willing to be honest with yourself about the preparation and work involved. There are no back doors, no free rides. There’s just you, this moment, and a choice.”

Wise words from Oprah, who seems to know a thing or two about achieving big dreams.

In his book Outliers, Malcolm Gladwell talks about how people reach a level of excellence and achievement in their field have all spent at least 10,000 hours practicing their skill, be it violin playing, ice hockey or in the case of Bill Gates, computer programming. Bill Gates had access to a computer in the 1960s as a teenager and would stay up all night programming so that by the age of 20, he was already an expert computer programmer, and perfectly primed to see the potential of a burgeoning computer industry.

Over a period of 10 years, 10,000 hours is approximately 15 to 20 hours per week. Some of the top dancers you see in reality shows like So You Think You Can Dance, have often been training since they were very young children, so that by the time they are in their late teens and old enough to audition for these reality shows, they are masters of their art form of dance.

I used to work as a natural health consultant. My job in the natural health store involved me serving customers that walked into the shop, who were searching for a remedy or help with some health or emotional problem; my job was to advise them on what remedies we had that could help them.

Over the 10 years that I worked in the shop, I mastered the ability to relate to people from all walks of life. Often, I would just listen to people. I became very good at listening. Because we also offered flower essences for emotional healing, I would listen to customers explain their lives and emotions in great detail and ascertain what their core issues were so that I could recommend a flower remedy combination that would help them.

While I worked in the shop, I gained life experience and trained as a healer and coach all through my 20s and early 30s. I eventually combined my experience working with the body and emotions through being a zen shiatsu therapist and natural health consultant with my training as a counsellor and coach based on the findings of the most recent social science, brain research and Acceptance and Commitment therapy.

Persistence was key in my journey of becoming a coach. There were many times when I didn’t know if I had what it took. There were certainly no obvious guarantees that I would reach my goal. But I had blind faith and dogged determination to put everything I had into my goals and dreams, and then some.

Someplace silent but strong within me knew that this was a goal worth putting all my eggs into one basket for and the longer I worked at it, the surer I became. So I kept going even when things did not seem to be working, or were getting more difficult.

I recently heard a very inspiring speech from an army officer, Lee Peh Gee. She was part of the first all-female team from Singapore in 2009 to summit Mt. Everest. In a simple, unassuming manner, she spoke of the many interviews and rounds of elimination she had to endure before being accepted as the last member of the team. They trained intensively for five years, climbing higher and higher mountains before eventually successfully reaching the summit of Mt. Everest.

Peh Gee explained that there are four base camps on the way to the summit of Everest. As she and her team made their way to each base camp, before the end of the day, they came back down again to the camp below. So as climbers summit Everest, several times, they have to go back in order to go forward as they acclimatize to the altitude.

Often we feel like we are going backwards when, in fact, we need to do so in order to go forward to get used to the new altitude. Especially in times of conflict or struggle, whether it’s interpersonal or internal, sometimes we need to retreat and strengthen ourselves before we head back up and out again. We may also need to re-assess the situation.

It is times like these that persistence is needed. The stamina and drive to keep going, even when things don’t seem to be working out and, in fact, seem to go backwards. Before her successful summit of Everest with her team, Peh Gee said, “I don’t dream of climbing Everest, I plan to.”

In order to achieve great things, you need to be able to persist and keep going.

Maybe not persistence to keep moving toward the same goal, but persistence to keep moving forward while you re-assess your goals and listen closer and deeper for the subtle nudges from your inner spirit that take you in the direction that you need to go to get back onto the right course in your life.

So stay the course. Persist. And you will find that things start to work out for you in your life.

Why didn’t you write that best-selling book you know is in you and tell your story? Why didn’t your dream to be an entrepreneur and set up that social enterprise come true? Maybe you didn’t persist.

Read: Why Things Don’t Work Out In Your Life Part 2

Contact me for a coaching consultation to speak more about how coaching can support you to achieve clarity, purpose and alignment with your goals in life.

_{Edited by Nedda Chaplin
Image credit: Evening colored view of Mount Everest from Gokyo valley with tourist from Shutterstock}

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Master coach Michelle Ayn Tessensohn talks about her career path, successes, failures and more. Gather inspiration and learn more about her life in this interview.

Chosen Career Path

My very first business was a publishing business, but it was shut down unfortunately by the landlords. My parents, who told me that, at eight years old, I should be focusing on school and not making money from my friends. Fortunately, this did not curb my entrepreneurial spirit.

I am now a master certified life coach and have been coaching since 2010. I run my own business working with clients one to one, in groups, and collaborate often with individuals and training companies to give talks and run courses. I was a holistic therapist and natural health consultant previously, working with natural remedies such as essential oils, herbs, and homeopathy from 1999.

I work primarily with women aged 35-45 plus, who are successful and independent but on the verge of burnout and feeling jaded. My clients are seeking deeper connections in their relationships, a sense of purpose in their careers or want to pursue creative aspirations. I help them overcome self-defeating habits and beliefs that keep them stuck, so they can live a fuller, more meaningful and mindful life.

On Following Dreams

In my early 20s, I left university and went to live with two yogis – much to the delight of my very Catholic parents. It was a time in my life where I felt a very strong urge to understand the deeper currents of life, so I could get some perspective on my struggles and make better choices.

I read many books on philosophy, metaphysics, religion, psychology, personal development, and spirituality. I went for therapy, past life healing, personal development courses, workshops and practiced yoga dutifully. I was blessed to meet many wise mentors, but also crossed paths with some charlatans (par for the course). I consciously began a journey to find enlightenment and that has been the overarching theme in my life for the last two decades.

As I healed and started to understand myself, I was able to help others who were also seeking healing, understanding and clarity on their life choices.

On Business And Career Dreams

I know it may sound like a cliché but I really love what I do and am constantly so thankful for finding work that holds so much meaning for me. It is truly an honour and privilege to be able to support others in finding greater peace and purpose.

In other ways, it has been much tougher than I thought it would be. It has taken me longer than I ever thought it would to learn all the skills necessary to establish myself. If I’m really honest, it is still a work in progress. I have had to repeatedly make a decision to keep going, be patient, humble, to think long term and let go of any expectations I have about where I think I should be professionally.

Entrepreneurial Frustrations

I feel sometimes like I am spinning my wheels and working very, very hard for very little return and that can get me questioning myself. I wonder if I can ever achieve what I want to professionally or if I should just go get a job at Starbucks.

It’s tough not to judge those times and there is this nagging subtle or sometimes not so subtle fear that I will always feel like that and never get any motivation or inspiration back.

*Cue disenfranchised grunge music soundtrack*

What I notice though is if I let myself take a breather, lower my expectations and output for a period while I recalibrate and reach out for a listening ear or just enjoy hanging out with nurturing friends, I do bounce back and often stronger for it.

On Failure And Important Life Lessons

For a long time, I let other people define me. I was convinced that if I had something great inside me, someone important would see it and tell me and then I would feel capable and confident. Over time, I realised that it doesn’t matter what other people tell us – even the really important people. We have to believe in ourselves first of all and stop underestimating what we have to offer.

I learnt that a lack of confidence does not equal a lack of talent: that my very own self-defeating habits and limiting beliefs held me back most. By addressing these issues, and I do not say that lightly as it has taken me years, I was able to largely free myself mentally and emotionally and become more authentic, peaceful and present in my life.

Now because of the journey I took, I help my clients track where a lack of self-belief may be holding them back. I show them the steps that they need to take to unravel their false beliefs and trust what they yearn to create in their lives is not only valid but possible, if they are willing to do what’s required to make it real. It is my view that we all have something great inside of us.

Work With Michelle

Contact me for a coaching consultation to speak more about how coaching can support you to achieve clarity, purpose and alignment with your goals in life.

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